|So it's time for some slave-labour again. This time Ulf wants a new sign for his new business, a candy and gift shop called Konfektasken, which translates as "The Candy Box" in english.|
Every time I'm out in my toolshop sweating, freezing and swearing over a job like this I promise myself that this is the last time, from now on I shall only work with my paintings, sculptures and program an occasional computer game when I'm in the mood for that. I have no apparent trouble with saying "no", still I end up doing stuff like this all the time.
First step is to print out all the necessary letters, K, O, N, F, E, T, A, S, hollow in order to save ink. I spread them out on the floor to check the letter's size.
Then I take the car out to my dreadfully cold toolshop, which is meant to be used mostly during summer.
In the toolshop I nail the letters to stacks of board, so I only have to cut out each letter once. Since the sign will be double sided I need 6 K's, 2 O's, 4 N's etc.
Nail gun nails... mmm... just like in Quake...
I cut out the letters using that machine your handicraft teacher always warned you about.
I've learned that it's a good idea to always begin with the most tedious stuff when making things, if following that practice it's kind of always downhill. The letters of the sign are the most detailed parts so I begin with them, among the letters with all their serifs and stuff the letter "K" is one of the most detailed, so that one goes first.
| Then I start cutting the plate which will work as the backbone of the sign. Since I'm too stingy (or poor) to have yet bought a nibbler I do it by hand, using this scissors - probably made in the 17th century. Luckily this right-left handedness handicap doesn't matter to me - yep, I'm ambidextrous - that way I get an even spread of blisters on both my hands.|
Then I cut out the rest of the sign-parts with this nifty electric saw, I could have used it to cut the plate but the wood-cutting blade has stuck so badly that the hard-to-find-a-new-one-screw which holds it in place will break next time I swap blades.
I glue stuff on using my glue gun - lots of guns here, but don't worry, these are guns that put things together.
This is no spaceship or something, so it's no meaning wasting time using ruler and calculator when putting things in place - if it looks good it is good.
When making signs and adverts you have to be careful with the meaning of what you're writing.
When writing "Konfektasken" I must make sure that the letter "T" don't stick out and emphasizes the tasken part of Konfektasken since "tasken" is a rather rude Swedish word for "the dick".
|The sign is ready for some paint, it sure doesn't look much to the world right now, but people complaining at this stage deserves to be thoroughly slapped.|
I stuff the half-finished sign into the car and drive back to the apartment, where I start painting the sign, first an English red foundation, foundations is the one and only use you got for this impossible color named "English red" (which looks as if it's made from grinded bricks) - use it for anything else and you'll just screw up your painting.
This is what I mean when I'm whining about wasting my time on jobs like this; look at this thing occupying my easel; it could have been a timeless piece of art, a painting expressing my metaphysical abstractions.
Now it isn't and I'm never gonna get this day back.
Gold for the letters, some green-bluish silver; mother-of-pearl for the chocolate spewing cornucopia.
Last thing I do is that I add some - as we say in Sweden - Puch Dakota Blue around the golden letters. A blue background for your text makes people somewhat more eager to buy your goods according to modern sales mythology. And if those letters also are golden things can't go wrong ey?
I've also utilized some Tai Chi hocus pocus in the design, but I won't dig any deeper into that here.
Color harmony is achieved when you embed colors, you can mix almost any colors if you allow them to grow forth from the background of what you're painting - never use a color on only one single spot in a painting or a design and people will regard you as having a a good feeling for color.
Work's done for today, it's 2'o clock in the morning, November 17th - time for bed, rather early actually. Paint must dry before the next phase.
|And now it's 9'o clock in the morning, I add some patina to make the sign look antique and emphasize details and stuff.|
...And here's Ulf, he's opening the shop today and is waiting for a sign to put above.
"LA-art", goodness, it wasn't even a year since I did that one for him!
|Yes, of course it's me on the ladder. Probably because it's -2C and rather windy.|
|Later this day I rented "War of The Worlds", and while we saw that movie I drank a bottle of the Gallo brother's Sierra Valley Zinfandel (A wine which some might argue is to heavily malolactic fermented since it's very low on tannins, but during grey winter evenings such as this one you need a wine that slips easily down the throat [making things somewhat summerish again that way only primitivo type grapes can do] without turning your teeth into files) - M didn't drink anything but still fell asleep during the cellar episode.|
Now it's in the middle of the night again and I'm writing this.