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Magnum Opus

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Below are 8 posts out of 509 I've written.
Some in Swedish, most in English.
This is the most recent stuff Here's next page, and that was yesterdays news.

2005-10-29 Grey weather yesterday, today, tomorrow...

People complain that I write to little about my day to day life as an artist, so let me ent... bore you to hell with this, and you'll see why I just put in the goodies in my blog instead of writing about everything that I stumble into.

I bought a new PC the other day. The old one is a "relic from the nineties" as a newspaper reporter put it when she wrote a (somewhat positive) review of Abashera revamped a year ago.
I'm not too comfortable with this new shiny black thing with its fancy blue lights and abundance of whispering fans. To reinstall all one's hardware and favourite programs is a neglected source of stress. Take my favourite drawing program for instance; Image In Color, perfect for simpler image editing when you do not feel like shooting mosquitoes with missiles; IOW, start up Photoshop. I'd lost the original Image In Colour-CD which came free with some ancient scanner eons ago and I couldn't find the slightest reference to the program on the net so I had to copy parts of the registry and manually move program folders, DLLs and such over to the new computer. It works, but for some reason it counts from zero to 10000% instead of up to 100% when it's busy doing things.
    I don't like Windows XP. There are too many hard to identify processes which run in the background, making my PC slow and wants to connect to the Internet for no apparent reasons at all from time to time. Gives me a creeping feeling of paranoia. Too many unnecessary monitoring programs and their all too many icons. Why, oh why do they all have to run at startup!
    I noticed this warning triangle down in the corner of the screen, "Oh hell, what is it now?" I thought and clicked on it. Up came a warning message from the sound card monitoring program: Warning! The sound volume might be set to low. RhaGHL!

    I edit .shtml-files with NoteTab (not Notepad). I tried to replace Notepad with NoteTab as a viewer and editor of HTML but Windows XP won't let me, because Windows XP thinks it's smarter than me and thinks I am making a great mistake to replace Notepad with NoteTab.
    When I as usual piped the .shtml files from NoteTab to IE in order to look at them as ordinary Internet pages all I saw was the code. Because of some nonsense fear of "harmful" "active content" XP didn't let me look at my own .shtml files made by me, stored on my computer. No clue was given by IE or XP, so I had to search the net for a solution, and found that I had to switch of this security blahabla in IE by clicking on Tools -> Internet Options -> Advanced, and there under the security settings allow viewing of active content on this computer. This utter bullshit came with SP 2 I heard, I hope the MS-people are smart enough to correct it in SP 3 then. They could also fix so that I do not always have to re-select "Show a detailed list" every damn time I want to open a file. They should have done that in Windows 3.1.

    All these security thingies seem to be of no use other than to make life more complex, hard to grasp and frustrating for common users. Spyware and virus makers have apparently no problem to get through; you should have been there when I removed Aurora from the Gallery Owners PC, or rather you shouldn't - you might not have survived.

    I want my Atari ST back, or even better, that god ol' SpectraVideo. What went wrong!?
Of course I tried to play some of these - for me - new and awesome games, Doom III and FarCry. What happened was that the screen went black in seconds - on both games. After several attempts I cursed the no-good useless game programmers of our days for a while, when I got tired of that I looked through this fancy plexiglass window this PC got (which probably makes it leak electro-radiation all over the place, making the phone go "schhhhhhh" ) and noticed that a small cable shoe was stuck in the fan of the Radeon X700 graphics card. I carefully removed the cable, the fan started, Doom III didn't crash, neither did FarCry. The card simply shut down when it had overheated. But the fan was damaged and made a whine which made stress related fungus grow on my skin.
I called the store which built my new PC and they told me to bring it in so that they could have a look at it. I strapped it in on the front seat of our now repaired Corrado and drove the 500 metres down town to the store. A helpful guy fiddled some with the fan and it went silent. I drove home again, turned on the PC and the fan started to sound like some kind of circle saw. I could soon pluck stress related champignons from my legs. We later on had those for dinner and thus saved a buck.
    I have a theory that this thing with "electricity allergy" actually are stress symptoms emanating from the noise modern machines make. Fans, tranformators, vibrating quartz crystals, fluorescent tubes etc. Quite many people can hear and feel sounds higher than 30 000 Hz actually. The main reason we moved out from our former apartment was the sound of the fans, on some locations in the flat the house's ventilation sounded like giant mosquitoes were having a ball above us. It was like distinct pools of sound. You could lie in bed at night and everything was silent, then if you moved just an inch in some direction you were drenched in those mosquito sounds. People didn't believe us until they experienced it themselves. It drove us crazy sometimes. It actually gave me a rash, my skin went dry and itchy. This rash disappeared instantly when we got to this for us new, but older silent flat.
I called the PC shop but the helpful guy wasn't there. I should come down to the store the next morning and he would be there to have a look at the fan. But the next morning I found that the car battery was exhausted, all this short distance driving never give the generator a chance to recharge the battery fully. So I postponed the visit to the computer store until the next day.
The next day I called the store but the helpful guy wasn't there. I then asked them to replace the broken fan - ever heard of something called warranty? - but the guy I talked to claimed that the guy that assembled my computer would never, ever build a computer that badly so that a cable would stuck in a fan. And what should they say to the suppliers of the graphic card in order to have it recalled? Blah blah. This is the point one is confronted with a choice. You either give up and pay for a new fan or you threaten to make a hate-page on the Internet about the store (They do have to mess things up a lot more before you actually waste time on making a hate-page, but you start getting your way by waving the threat of one in front of them).
I did neither, I'm currently too tired of things (yes, just "things") to argue, so I went to the Other, Nice Computer Store and bought a very good fan for a third of the cost of a similar fan at the Bad Store, went home, replaced the broken fan and then urged all my acquaintances to never shop at The Bad Store - they won't. Computer now runs fine and silent.

Computer tries to take over my life, I got must-do perl projects up to my nose, got to get out and run for a few kilometres, despite the pain and stiffness I feel in my legs due to the cold and damp Swedish autumn climate. My legs never hurt during summers.

Artist with axe
Now that I got some time and gold to spend I went out to my toolshop in order to upgrade - pimp up - the frames of some of my paintings. First I remove the old frames with an axe...
Bling-bling golden picture frames
...then I do a lot of things, and in the end this is the result: Shiny-shiny bling-bling frames of gold.
Autumn leaf
We're in the middle of the autumn, it seems that I couldn't escape winter this year either.
Pretty big spider
This is about as big spiders get here in Sweden.
The Girl Behind wants to be mentioned (she found the field at the top of this page). She runs a quite readable blog with personal reflections blended with mixed pic(k)s of interest from the internet.

Usama Bin Laden serves George Bush Jr the World on a silver plate2005-10-13
Five new sculptures added. Click on the image, or below:New paintings will be added within a few days - so stay tuned.


These new sculptures got me listed on the front page of Internet's number one humour portal,, something which is many a webmaster's wet dream.

My visitor stats nearly tripled and I got more than 8000 visitors yesterday. Got to get more bandwidth.


Cooking rice noodles


Start boiling the noodles in un-salted water.

Today I'm going to show you what I make for breakfast, almost every day.
If you wish to grow a brain as big and bright as mine you might want to follow my example and make this omega 3 rich breakfast, you need this (in order of appearance):
  • 1 can of mackerel (aprox. 125 g)
  • 1 square of rice noodles (90 g)
  • Ketchup
  • Sugar
  • Lemon or lime juice
  • Olive oil
  • Bouillon
  • Curry
  • Chilli pepper
  • Cinnamon
Remove plastic2

While the noodels are boiling, carefully remove the plastic which keeps the mackerel cans together.

Makrill, mackerel: Omega 33

Open the mackerel can. It's in these the omega 3 oil resides, without it your brain will mal-funny-thinkion.

Mackerel noodles4

Put the mackerel among the noodles, which by now should be finished with their boiling.

Curry cooking

Lots of curry is a must.


Add some ketchup.

Chanterelle bouillon7

Instead of ordinary salt you use bouillon.

chilli pepper

Chilli pepper.

Remove cat9

Dispose of cat.

Lemon juice10

Use quite a lot of lemon juice. Even better - for that earthy flavour - use lime juice.


A pinch of cinnamon.


Sugar is one of the secret ingredients in many a dishes (chicken bouillon is another). One teaspoon of it - sugar - here. (You won't believe how much sugar they use in cordon bleu stuff and such)

Pour olive oil

Some olive oil intensifies the flavour, the more the merrier.

You spare the olive oil until last, otherwise all other ingredients will get encapsulated in the oil.

"But does that matter, since the oil will be mixed with the rest of the food anyway"

you might say, and of course you're right, so stir down the oil and the other stuff in whatever order you feel appropriate.


And now - and this is important - Stir it all together while you heat it up somewhat.

Artist mackerel breakfast15

Voila! Serve with the latte you learned of in my previous post and you're soon ready for bed again. That green stuff is parsley.

Here's the work of another artist who apparently ate fish for breakfast; Braque.


It's possible to make a decent latte (which is not short for cafe au lait, latte is Italian for milk, which means that if you order a latte in Italy you will most likely get a glass of milk) at home with a rather ordinary coffee maker. Although, I have found that you get what you pay for when it comes to coffee makers. I have had to call PartSelect a dozen times just to replace a thermostat (sometimes I question whether I should just buy a new coffee maker). Either way, a great latte is quite simple to make and is the perfect pick-me-up.

This is what you need:

  • Strong coffee
  • Milk
  • A large cup
  • An electric milk whisker
  • A coffee maker which heats the water to more than 90°C (194°F)
  • Sugar
  • If you're a beginner: A large living fly
Brew strong coffee1

Brew enough coffee to fill half your large cup. Use two tablespoons of coffee / person.

Coffee and milk2

Pour half a cup of milk and heat it in your microwave oven. Don't let the milk boil - that will make it taste slightly like gruel. If you like that, then boil the milk - but keep that to yourself.

Sugar and coffee3

Add a few teaspoons of sugar to the milk before you whip it.

Making a latte4

Whip the milk until a fly can walk over it without wetting its feet.

Pour coffee5

Add the coffee without ruining the foam.

Stir the coffee6

Stir your latte under the foam with milk whisker and end it by making a nice pattern in the foam.

It's done, now drink it.

Some might argue that this is a café au lait and not a cafe latte, and sure, the recipe tells you to mix 50/50 coffee and milk, as when one makes a café au lait, and not 1/3 espresso and 2/3 milk, as when making a cafe latte by the textbook. But neither you nor your friends, and most baristas will notice any difference so why bother.

Krockad Corrado2005-10-04
Jag följde kungens exempel och brast i uppmärksamhet ett ögonblick i rusningstrafiken. I och för sig, hade Sundsvalls vägnät inte planerats av Apan Jocko hade det inte hänt, och om "om" inte funnits hade jag klarat mig också. Tur att tidigare ägare plockat ut krockkuddarna, annars hade katten M hade i knät varit platt i dag. Resultatet blev ett behov av en ny motorhuv och vänster lyktglas. Ny lack blir det till våren.

Roligare var att Brånfelt från Dagbladet var in med fotograf på galleriet och intervjuade mig om utställningen.

I followed the example stated by the Swedish king and didn't pay proper attention during rush hour - the result; a need for a new bonnet and a headlight glass. Attention and attention, if the city planning of city Sundsvall hadn't been made by Intelligent Monkey Jocko it wouldn't have happened, and if "if" hadn't existed I would have made it also. Luckily the previous owner took out the crash cushions, otherwhise the cat M had in her lap had been flat today. The car gets a new paintjob next spring - it's a waste to do such a thing before or during the winter.

Better news is that I was interviewed by Brånfelt from the paper Dagbladet at the gallery regarding my exhibition today.

Exhibition opening at L-A ART - Vernissage på L-A ARTOpened the exhibition on L-A Art yesterday. The paper had a full page on it the same day. Celebrities and non-celebrities with an art interest in common came by and sipped some Muscat de Alexandrie, enjoyed my latest artistic mischiefs and only just enough people got violently upset.
The exhibition was a success within an hour.
Later on we celebrated the success with a five-course dinner at a Spanish restaurant.
This morning I awoke eight o'clock in the morning, very surprised over the fact that I was up that early - the mystery was solved when I realized that yesterday night was the first evening in weeks I got to bed before four o'clock in the morning.

Ulf Blücher and Max Magnus NormanVernissage på L-A Art i går. ST hade en helsida om mig och utställningen inne samma dag. Kända och okända konstkonnesörer kom och smuttade på Muscat de Alexandrie och njöt av mina senaste konstnärliga alster, och bara ett lagomt fåtal blev vildsint upprörda.
Utställningen var en succé inom en timme efter öppnandet.
Senare firade vi succén med en 5-rätters middag på Saffran, en spansk restaurang - pröva deras musslor, man dreglar vid blotta minnet.
I morse vaknade jag strax efter åtta, mycket förvånad att jag var uppe och pigg vid denna arla morgonstund, mysteriet löstes då jag insåg att kvällen innan var den första gången på flera veckor jag kommit i säng före fyra på morgonen.

Max Magnus Norman exhibits his art at L-A ART - Max Magnus Norman ställer ut på L-A ART


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